Monday

This morning I weighed in at an even 140kg. When I started I was almost 144kg so I'm counting that as almost 4kg lost in just over a week! Go me!!

I had two stressful moments on Saturday, both of which I navigated without eating crap. I did, however, binge - on four cruskits with low fat cheese slices. The calories were negligent but I was very conscious of, and annoyed at, the way I gorged them. I was stressed out over a visit we'd had with Neil's mum (who is so negative and depressed, and her energy always affects me and makes me feel low). During the visit we took her McDonalds for lunch, and I had a garden salad. I had to watch Neil and his mum eat cheeseburgers, nuggets and fries! I was so proud of myself, and really didn't miss the junk food that much. Except for the emotionally calming effect it may have had on me for a few minutes.

I am trying hard to eat more slowly and mindfully. To chew my food properly, and enjoy the taste and the sensation of eating. My nightly salad or vegetables are wonderful, I really look forward to them after shakes or bars all day.

I see my weight loss surgeon this afternoon for the first time in about three years. I want to update him with my progress, or lack thereof, and talk to him about maybe getting revision surgery next year. I'm hoping it won't be necessary, and that I will be able to shrink my sleeve/stomach back to its small size and make some better food choices, as well as get my binge eating under control. But if my current plan doesn't work, I want to know what my options are. I read that in the US some doctors are re-sizing people's sleeves via endoscopy, so you don't even need to have keyhole surgery. I guess the fact that this, and other revisions, are occuring, mean I am not the only person to stuff up their sleeves and not lose the weight. Which does make me feel better.

Currently, this is the status:
800 calories a day (3 x meal replacement shakes, bars, soups or puddings plus two cups of vegies plus the occasional non-wheat cracker and cheese)
At least 8 cups of water a day
30 mins easy walking a day (to and from the bus stop, so I have to do it!)